Thursday, August 28, 2008

Livin' on Tulsa time

Or just east of Tulsa time.
The school year is fully rolling and I'm still completely lost.
When did high schoolers become so old? Yet they still have no idea how the world works....
It's making me wonder what I was like in high school. It's almost hard to remember. I was a spaz most of the time, but did my teachers think that? I thought I was so smooth when I'd try to pull some stunt...did they just let me or did they have no idea? I know exactly what these kids are up can't shit a shitter.....and boy could I bullshit. It's that creative gene.
Anyway, life in a small town is moving along. I still haven't met my neighbors. But I have met their cats and that's more important to me, really.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

I. Am. Job.

I have a teaching gig. The timeline of this holy miracle is as follows:

Wednesday: Tori- "Hey, I think I know of a school that needs an art teacher" Me-"Oh really? Let me finish this hot dog and I'll ask you more about it."
Thursday: Look up said school, decide it doesn't suck, send in resume out of complete lack of options, expecting nothing.
Friday: Get a phone call from school asking for an interview that day. Drive 2 hours, get lost, get hired.
Saturday: Find a home in said school district.
Sunday: Move
Monday: Go to OKC to complete transfer of teaching certificate
Tuesday: Begin to mould/mold young minds. Begin to receive graphic design job offers from firms I applied to in Austin. Stupid timing.

Needless to say, I'm exhausted and need a visit from my ole friend Jack Daniels. He can move in with me at this point, I have an extra room.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

I love cable.

I haven't had real cable in over 2 years. TWO YEARS!!!
I've existed on Reba and One on One reruns on the three channels that I could get with rabbit ears. Don't diss Reba!
Luckily, I'm still looking for a job here in the Heartland so I have plenty of time to work on my cable deficit.
So far today I've watched a documentary about Bigfoot, Tori & Dean, some show about how bread is made, the Sopranos, and more Tori & Dean. I am so tired! And I want some bread!
I decided to take a break from my gorgeous plasma screen ( and by "my" I mean "my parents'") to take a little hike at an old waterfall out in the country. Nature is great, but Madea's Family Reunion was coming on at 11:30 so I made it a short trip.
But the outing helped me decide that I will indeed be trying out for the US Olympic synchronized swimming team next week. I've been watching alot of QVC to train. Cross your paws!
This post was pointless...

Friday, August 1, 2008

Best Animals Ever

I have alot of insane dreams. Last night I not only dreamed that I was attending college at Ramen Noodle University, but I also dreamt that I discovered two new species of animals. Which prompts me to make this list of real-life animals that I wish I had discovered.

In no particular order...

Mimic Octopus.

This thing can change into anything. I've personally seen one transform into a 15 foot conversion van with rims and ground effects. Amazing.


These precious baby bears can hold anything in those pouches. Think of the possibilities! Plus their razor-sharp claws of justice can tear through any bag of snacks you may struggle with.


This video explains it much better than I ever could.


Let's face it, they're better than dogs. Get over it.
Can your dog bring about world peace or fix your router? Doubtful. It's a scientific fact that cats can do those things. The Japanese love them and we all know that they know cute more than any other nation of people.
Dispute me. I dare you.