Me: Hey, how was the sub yesterday?
Kid: She flipped me off and made me brush her hair.
Me: You should name your new cat Taylor.
Spacey Girl: No! That's my friend Taylor's name! *Scrapes cheese off Sonic wrapper with teeth* I'm thinking 'Cheesepaper'.
Kid to other kid: HEY! GIMME BACK MY UNICORN!!!!
An open letter to the family of a wasp, murdered in cold blood, by a sophomore boy:
Dear Mr. Wasp,
I am terribly sorry for killing you. It really felt like you were trying to sting me so I was just protecting myself and my classmates. I hope you understand where I'm coming from. It was just my natural instincts kicking in. They told me "hey, that wasp is going to sting you, someone better kill it", so I killed you. IT was only for the betterment of the class. My sincerest apologies go out to your family and friends.
Friday, November 6, 2009
Fun Fridays
Monday, October 26, 2009
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Somewhere... Oscar Mayer is crying...
Incredulous girl to emphatic boy: *hands on hips* I find it hard to believe that she would throw her good sandwich at you!!!!!!
Monday, September 28, 2009
And they never found her body...
Girl: Miss Jumper, you should totally hang out at the Rock Garage with us!
Me: Umm, I'm 29 years old.
Girl: Ohhh...well you could totally hang out with my gramma!
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