Me: Hey, will you pick up that pencil you just dropped...
Incredulous Senior Boy: That pencil ain't miiiine! That pencil don't even look like me!

Shoeless freshman: You know what would be really terrifying?? A shapeshifting otter. ESPECIALLY in the whisker area....

Ginger Boy: *Hummmming in unison with some other kids* Man, we are good at this. We should start a three-way singing group....a vocal threesome...a three-man voice orgy.....what is that called?!

Not-So-Small-Emo-Boy: *Sits up straight* IT'S 10 AM AND I NEED A BURRITO!!!!!!!

Summer Olympics 2040

Bro 1: Ugh, I forgot. I have detention for misbehaving in Spanish.

Bro 2: What for??

Bro 1: Playing "Gay Chicken" disruptively.

Bro 2: What's "Gay Chicken"?!

Bro 1: When you get as close to kissing your dude friend as you can before chickening out.....I won.

Dead serious kid with no shoes: I like your earrings, by the way...they remind me of me. I like to fly. I'm a fly guy. Not a shy guy.

I see my friiiends.

Not-so-small-emo-boy: (Frantically) Wait a minute...it's the Tuesday after Spring Break and not a single person has mentioned Rebecca Black?!?! Maybe they're waiting for Friday....